John McCain Picks Cardinals to Win Super Bowl; Dems Claim Victory After Game "Just For Fun"

TAMPA BAY, FL- In what some are calling one of the lamest possible things the Democrats can do to rub John McCain's loss in his face, the Democrats claimed Victory yet again Sunday night- Because McCain picked the Cards to win. President Obama held a press conference that night to congratulate the Steelers for "sort of doing the same thing I did". Joe Biden, though uninvited, also made an appearance only to say that he "wanted the Cards to win too, because he thought Kurt Warner reminded him of himself and the team reminded him of Barack..." when asked what he meant, he went on to say "Joe Biden is like Kurt Warner... I'm leading an inexperienced team in the big game... er sorry folks, my mouth is like a train: it starts going, and can't be stopped".
Joe later left the conference, only to find Barack didn't like a word he said. Other Democrats were asked what they thought as well, with Hilary Clinton saying "it was a great game..." and "I should probably get some terrible towels too for when I'm president". Her husband Bill thought it was a good game as well, and that the cheerleaders did a great job cheering the team on. It was also reported he later called both franchises to find out how to get them for Hilary's next campaign, because "She always needs people to cheer her on". My sources thought for a minute or so about whether or not to ask Nancy Pelosi for her opinion of the game, but they quickly realized she would just take the opportunity to talk about pass "protection", rather than the actual game.

In other news, former Illinois Governor Rod Blagojevich went legally insane after cops wouldn't arrest him for "illegally trying to sell Super Bowl XLIII seats for the right price". Turns out, he finally did something that is worthy of the words "legally" and "selling" in the same sentence.